Hello blackWorm and X and Pat and broomhead
Friday, January 30, 2004
A. Pick one.
B. Pick all of the below.
C. Write a story called, "Cherry's Ark"
D. Lend me some sugah', I AM your neibah'.
Tuesday, January 27, 2004
I love this from Mantofev:.
It reminds me how I wish you all were here every time I go to Home Depot. The first time I went there, about a month after I came down from Boston, I was like, "I have died and this is heaven... all these little pieces for Art Group!" But every time I go I understand more and more that all the little pieces are meant for things with names like wash-basin-caulking-removal-application and wing-nut-extension-ballast-support-someone-else-is-using-me-as-a-tool-provision.
Wow Cherry, I love to hear excitement in your fingers. "This is it!" sends shivers of anticipation down my spine. Ken Hakuta's thing sounds
good and easy to enter. His website is a little full of words like "sell," "capital," "percentage," and "profit," and phrases like "milk the product to death," "up to his gills in money," "reap the benefit," and "bulk up the profits."
But after reading it I feel like I could "pull off" any "control strategy."
Here's an idea: We could propose to Mr. Hakuta a children's book entitled, "Little Patrick Foo Foo meets Mrs. Beasly and the Evil-Lawyer-Attracting-Knockoff-Schemes". Story by Ken Hakuta and Patrick Timony, Pictures by Cherry Ogata.
*********
One sunny day I was "dumping on the market at any price," and I ran into Mrs. Beasly who said to me, "Let's drop our pants," and "slice the pie," because "everything is negotiable."
"Why, Mrs. Beasly!" I exclaimed. "You can't have someone learning on the job." "They'll stab you in the back if they can," unless of course you'd like to "pay through the nose..."
Mrs. Beasly looked at me and smiled. "That's contingent on you producing and producing big." "The distribution game is a jungle" and you have to "jack the price up."
"Behind my back she was trying to get a piece of my rights in exchange for distributing a huge shipment of Foo Foo. Her lawyer tried to slip a clause in my agreement that stated she would approve imports. This meant she could stop my imports from coming in at any port of entry. If I had been unhappy with her performance or for any reason wanted to replace her, I would have been stuck because she could stop my imports at the dock. Then where would I have been?
Logistically it was a huge operation. One of my distributors sent me his shipping clerk to help with the paperwork. But he double-crossed me and told the shipping clerk to make all the Foo Foo payable to him, the distributor, instead of to me. I discovered this after the shipments had gone out and it was too late to do anything about it. So I was in the position of having him pay me instead of the other way around. After a lot of threats and long-distance yelling matches, I ended up losing 50,000 lbs. of Foo Foo on the deal.
All types of people will try to pull stuff like that all the time, and you have to just keep saying to yourself, "I have got to keep control here." Again and again and again and again until you can't get it out of your head and you just want it to stop but it won't so you go ahead and start doing the evil things it is covertly implying that you should do like get a piece of Mrs. Beasly's rights by taking them forcefully from where she is hiding them, inside her skull!!! AhhhhRRRGGGHHH!!! GAHHHHHHHH!!! HACK! HACK! HACK!
Moral of the Story: I only did what they do all the time, only I did it first.
***
Or maybe that's too heavy handed. I shouldn't be so much of a fucking communist I guess. We should deffinately send a proposal into to Mr. Hakuta just because those Wall Crawlers are so cool, but why not do the MIT 50k thingy too? What I think we need most of all is a product before we go deciding who to sell it too. I think my next project is going to be to take one of the Cherry Characters and turn it into a Rhino 3D object... Any preferences on which one Cherry?
Monday, January 26, 2004
Happy snow-morning. No jurry duty today, so I'm inventing important things like... the all-tool! Mr. All-tool has cute minimalist eyes and a startlingly simple cornucopaic construction. You can bang home nails with Mr. All-tool's nose, or use his graduated spiral groove as a wrench that fits any nut! You can also pry out nails, using the groove as a hammer-claw and his tail as a lever, or just hold him tightly in your hand and feel how naturally he fits there! You can also hang him by his springy tail from just about any nook or cranny, including your nose! Don't wait! Order now! What are you waiting for? Available for a limited time only! Act now!
P.S. Check out my new "Peopleshapes" painting that I did Friday on MSPaint instead of doing my homework!
"Peopleshapes"
Plus! Now -- Live Dog noses!
"All Nude, All Cold, All Wet, All Day!" Startling shape, no?
